Do you know why I am awake at 4:15 a.m. Mountain Daylight Time?
I can’t sleep because I have a screwed up spine, a chipped-up left shoulder, and I have to figure out how in the hell I’m going to get my girlfriend over here when her contract as a damn maid in the United Arab Emirates is up.
She lives in the Philippines and we came across each other on a dating site-and no, she hasn’t asked me for a dime…so you can just shut your mouth right there. Actually, she’s working her heart out for her children.
She has family here.
It’s very hard to sleep when someone you love wants you as much as you want them and you’re a universe apart.
What I have to do is somehow get some kind of gig and work through the pain as much as I possibly can, because she and I have calculated the costs-and I’m going to have to work my ass off.
It’s not that she’ll leave because I’m broke right now. She knows my circumstances. She knows what my ex-wife did to me after I got hurt at Walmart. We talk about it often-and we get deep into the discussion.
How bad off am I?
I’m currently in physical therapy, where my entire upper-left side hurts like hell after the session. My spine and my shoulder are pushed to the San Andreas, and I feel the effects for the next twelve to twenty-four hours.
I can’t do much of anything after therapy, and keep in mind that I haven’t a regular full-time job in three years because of this. There are even times when I have to take breaks from typing because of the pain. In fact, I can feel the needles in my left-middle and left ring fingers as I work on this article, but I’m determined to finish this because I have to get the words out of me.
I suppose that I get this discipline from my late grandfather, Charles Horace Bogard (1905-1998), because he worked through the Great Depression and World War II with a brutal back which caused him intense pain most of the time.
A job is a job, and I have to finish this one. I might not be able to lift a box anymore, but I can still use my brain and put my thoughts to the computer.
I just hope it’s enough for Jennie’s sake.